40. In another time the sky will burn and we will see if you need me then.

It was real. Everything I had wanted for so long stood in front of me asking for a second chance. Someone that I had been obsessing of for so long, I had been dreaming of him during the nights and looking for his footsteps during the day. He stood there, with a new look in his eyes, ready but still very secure of himself, asking me to fall for him all over again.

I punctured my heart for you. I could not breath for months.
You made me so so angry and depressed and happy at the same time.

I missed you for so long.

For such a long time that I forgot who I was, where I lived, who I used to talk to and what I used to do.
Your love ate me up. It swallowed me whole and consumed me completely.
I had never felt that kind of heartbreak in my entire life and I dont think that I´d survive it a second time around.

That´s what I would have said to him if I was a braver version of myself. But I´m not.
I am a coward and maybe I will always be. I don´t care, actually.
Even though I could not say the words thru my mouth they shined clearly from my eyes.